Than Goodness for Rubber Chickens

Including Jack can be difficult. Jack is sometime uncooperative. Anyone with children can relate to that, but if you have a child with special needs, you realize that I am painting a nice picture by using the word uncooperative. When he was little I used to be able to pick him up and carry him on my hip if he pitched a fit and refused to budge. Back then all I had to deal with was the disapproving looks of strangers, thinking that I had a spoiled kid on my hands, and not the autistic child that he was, sensitive to lights and sounds that would set him off and make him cry. At 14, lifting Jack is like trying to dislodge a bolder from the ground. There's no moving him if he's made up his mind he's gonna sit.

When he was eight, our family went to my daughters dance recital. My husband dropped my daughter, Jack the baby and me, off near the building where we were headed because the parking lot was full and the only spots required a long walk. Jack decided that he didn't want to go into the building and so he sat right down in the middle of the parking lot. As all eyes turned towards us, Jack began his usual commotion. My 5 year old daughter, all dressed up in her cute little tutu, looked up at me and doled out the obvious observation, "Maybe we shouldn't have brought him ". She was right, and I wished I had gotten a sitter, but alas, I was relegated to listening to advice from my 5 year old that I wish I had figured out earlier.

Jack still has cooperation issues today, but we've all gotten smarter. Sometimes, Jack just doesn't get to go certain places if I know ahead of time that it will be difficult for him to cope in certain surroundings. We've also learned what motivates Jack to behave.

Jack rides the bus to school everyday, and the bus driver, God bless him, related a funny story to me. The other day the teacher came out the get the kids off of the bus at school, and Jack wouldn't budge. So she picked up her walkie talkie and called for backup. The bus driver had a laugh, because she called the other teacher to bring out the "Emergency Rubber Chicken". Apparently Jack got the rubber chicken and happily exited the bus to begin his day of school.

The Hard Places

Advocating for a child with special needs can be a consuming undertaking. Taking care of aging parents, young children, and difficulties of every kind can drain the fun right out of a person. I've decided to post someone else's words today, because they came to me at such an appropriate time. Here's what came to me through a friend, and I'd like to share it with you:

The Value of Hard Places
by Os Hillman

So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you. - 2 Corinthians 4:12

Being forced into hard places gives us a whole new perspective on life. Things we once valued no longer hold the same value. Small things become big things, and what we once thought big no longer holds such importance.

These hard places allow us to identify with the sufferings of others. It keeps us from having a shallow view of the hardships of others and allows us to truly identify with them. Those who speak of such trials from no experience often judge others who have had such hardship. It is a superficiality of Christian experience that often permeates shallow believers.

Those who have walked in hard places immediately have a kinship with others who have walked there also. They do not need to explain; they merely look at one another with mutual respect and admiration for their common experience. They know that death has worked a special thing in them. This death leads to life in others because of the hard places God has taken them through.

It is impossible to appreciate any valley experience while you are in it. However, once you have reached the top of the mountain, you are able to appreciate what terrain you have passed through. You marvel at what you were able to walk through. The valley of the shadow of death has yielded more than you ever thought possible. You are able to appreciate the beauty of the experience and lay aside the sorrow and pain it may have produced.

Death works in you for a greater purpose. If you are there today, be assured that God is producing something of much greater value than you will ever know.

May God's blessing be with you today!

Oh, to be Happily Oblivious

I have another Special Education Advisory Committee Meeting tomorrow. The last one seemed to get bogged down in a lot of nonsense discussion. However, I am hopeful that all the committee members will learn from our experiences and begin to move forward in a unified direction instead of getting stuck like we did two weeks ago. The Director of Special Education has cultivated a defensive attitude among the parents of children in the special education department, that has been characteristic of her regime. I don't think at this point any "good will" on her part can repair the image that she has created. Furthermore, I am doubtful that she has any inclination to do anything different than what she has been doing previously. That leaves the special ed parent community to figure out how to work with the situation at hand, and how to work with each other. (She has us right where she wants us!) At least that's what I'm thinking. She won't have to make any changes in her policy if she can get the parents on the advisory committee bogged down in nonsense discussions.

Luckily, Jack is happily oblivious to the valiant efforts on his behalf. According to him, the world is as it should be.